HE Will Take Care of Us

I really don't know how to start this one.

From the moment I found out I was pregnant with Noah, I had concerns that I would go into pre-term labor. Brady was born, healthy, at 36 weeks, but 36 weeks is still considered pre-term. I knew that there was a greater risk with this pregnancy that my baby would come early.

Yesterday, at 33 weeks and 1 day, that almost happened. I started having contractions in the morning. They were irregular, but more frequent than they should be, and I started paying attention. Shortly after lunch, they were 4 minutes apart and I was having some serious back pain. I called labor & delivery, knowing what they would say, and after throwing a few things into a bag, just in case, we were off to the hospital.

After they got me hooked up to all of the monitors the midwife came in and talked me through what the treatment plan would be and did an exam. She also spoke of the "worst case scenario" and told me not to be too concerned, that 33 week babies usually did well after a few weeks in the NICU and that if labor couldn't be stopped, some one from the NICU would be up to talk me through everything and answer my questions.

Those are things that no mother wants to hear or talk about.

Next, they ran two bags of fluid to try to hydrate the contractions away. That didn't work...at all. Two hours later, the contractions were MUCH more intense and my back was hurting so bad that I was white knuckling the bed rail.

They gave me a shot of something, I can't remember the name of the medication, and within 20 minutes the contractions were much less intense and my back was starting to relax for the first time in hours. After about an hour they had completely stopped. They did another exam, just to make sure that my cervix hadn't changed with all of those contractions, which I was sure it must have, but it didn't!

After going to the pharmacy to pick up some medication we were on our way home! My baby wasn't coming today!!

I'm not on strict bed rest, but I was told to stay off of my feet and sleep as much as possible. No cooking, no cleaning, no housework or errands of any kind, and NO more picking up Brady.

Now, I really just said all of that to say this...

From the moment I realized what was or could be happening I was uncharacteristically calm.

I began to pray and to keep my focus on the only One who could protect me and Noah.

"Be still, and KNOW that I AM GOD." Psalm 46:10

God placed that scripture in my heart and that was what kept running through my mind.

Sure, there were moments that I let myself "go there" and think about the what ifs of a baby born at just 33 weeks, and then I remembered something I read on a friend's blog who was doing a Beth Moore bible study.

"If __________ (insert your greatest fear into the blank), then _____________ (insert what you would do here) ____________."

If, Noah is born today and whisked off to battle it out in the NICU, then I would bawl my eyes out, wonder what is so broken about my body that I can't carry my children to term, maybe feel a little sorry for myself, then suck it up and do everything they told me to do in order to help my child survive. And, I would thank God for every day that I could watch him grow stronger.

The point of the exercise is this: No matter the if, the then is really always the same...

If, my greatest fear comes true...

Then, God will take care of me.

Then, God will take care of Noah.

And so, I held on to those two thoughts and never had a doubt that we would be okay.

The same God who created the universe...

Who calmed the storm...

Who walked on water...

Who gave me life...

Who formed my precious child 33 weeks ago...

The same God who has already ordained the day, the hour, the very second that he will enter into this world, was still God.

He was in control.

And He would take care of us.

And that's exactly what He did.

I don't know how much longer it will be before Noah makes his appearance, but I know that when he does, he will be okay.

My long term goal is to get to my 36 week appointment on the 4th of February, but until then I will thank God for every day that He allows Noah to stay put.

Every day is another day that Noah grows stronger, healthier and becomes more ready to make his transition into this world.

Every 24 hours counts!

So today, I'm thanking his Creator for the answered prayer of another 24 hours.

And for the peace He has given me in knowing that He is God, and He will take care of us.