Journal for Miss Isabella

I've been wanting to make one of these journals ever since I saw the ones Mrs. Skinner was making over at The Polkadot Giraffe.

I had this pretty pink and green scrapbook paper to use and I thought of little Bella, who has a pretty pink and green nursery.

The problem was finding ribbon. You can't find any here. So, I ordered some online, along with enough to make journals for my boys.

I plan on using theirs (which I've yet to make) to record all of the cute, funny things they say and do to melt my heart. I hope Bella's mommy can find a use for hers.

It Used To Be Beautiful

This is what I've been looking at since the 2nd week of December!

The first 2 or 3 weeks it was nice...beautiful even...and then it never stopped!

It has snowed at least 2 days out of every week since the first snow in December.

I live in a snow globe...and I don't even like snow globes!

I think the reason I hate it so much is that on days like today, when the snow is blowing sideways and hasn't stopped pouring down since before I opened my eyes, the roads are horrible! They can't clear them fast enough.

For a woman who could go into labor any day now (and has already made two trips to the hospital for pre-term contractions) and the hospital is 40 minutes away, this is NOT a good thing. I worry that we might get out on those bad roads and get stranded. And as wonderful as my husband is, I do not want him delivering my baby in the back seat, or anywhere else for that matter!

So I sit here on my couch, looking out the window, biting my nails, hoping and praying that today (or a day like this) is not the day Noah decides to come.

I Don't Know How He Did It

The other morning Brady was playing with the swing turning it on and off. No big deal.

We decided to put it out a few weeks early so that maybe by the time Noah arrives he'd be used to it...and leave it alone.

I look over at him after about 2 minutes and this is how I find him...IN the swing!

I still have NO IDEA how he got in there.

See that plastic bar with the stars on it. You know, the one that's there to keep babies in, or as I thought toddlers out. Turns out it doesn't work very well. It was attached, snapped tightly in place and Brady STILL got in there and positioned his legs around it.

He was thrilled with himself! He'd make it rock as hard as he could and yell, "SVING!" (No that's not a typo, that's how he says swing. :)

He's such a little monkey!

From Bravo Company To The Cav (COC)

Last Wednesday, the 20th, Buck had his change of command.

He relinquished command of Bravo Company, 4-70th Armor and took command of Delta Troop, 5th Cav, the Brigade Reconnaissance Troop. Actually, it happened in reverse order, which was really weird. For about an hour he was in command of two companies.

It was a bitter sweet day for him. He took command of Bravo in December of 2008, while in Iraq. He had built some wonderful relationships and camaraderie with those soldiers and he was proud of them and of that company.

On the other hand, he's a Cav guy. He's really been looking forward to taking Delta Troop. The Cav is a whole other beast and what he knows best. Like they say, "If you ain't Cav, you ain't ---- (a four letter explicative that starts with S and I won't say)!" And if you're wondering what the funny looking hat he's wearing is all about, it's a stetson...a Cav tradition that only Cav troopers wear. (Think guys on horseback in the Civil War). It looks funny, but it's a cool tradition.

Since I am on bed rest, Brady and I didn't get to be there. I was awfully disappointed that I couldn't be there to support my husband, my hero and my best friend, but he knows that my love and complete support are his. As upset as I was, we both knew that my place was here, taking care of me and Noah, and that by doing so, I was taking care of us all.

I did send both of our cameras, so when he got home that night, we were able to watch the video and look at the pictures from the day and share in his moment with him.

I am so proud of him and his accomplishments. I know that he will do wonderful things with Delta Troop, just as he did with Bravo Company. He's a great soldier, but more importantly a great man, who does his job not only with great skill, but with great integrity.

We as his family, are blessed to have him as our leader, as are those men that he commands.

Happy Birthday, B!

I'm a few days late on this post.

Brady's birthday was on the 17th.

We had a party planned.

It was going to be adorable! A little sock monkey theme. I worked for a week on the decorations. The day before we made cupcakes and cookie bars. I had started putting up the decorations and then...

I started having regular contractions and ended up in labor & delivery...again.

So we had to cancel the party.

I was heartbroken. I so wanted my baby to have fun party on his big day. I even had the cutest little sock monkey shirt made for him to wear to the party.

We had to postpone his first birthday party as well...he had pneumonia and was released from the hospital just two days before.

But, luckily, both times we've at least managed a cake, or this year, cupcakes, balloons, and a few people who love him to cheer him on as he blows out his candles. Last year my mom took it upon herself to make sure he had a small celebration and this year, our friends, the Steinhauers came by with a wonderful dinner, gifts and their precious little one, Chase...who by the way is smart, beautiful and my future daughter-in-law! :) She and Brady had the best time playing with his new easel that we got him and hiding out in our bedroom. At one point we caught them kissing in the corner of our room! Yep, that's right...kissing! Brady had his little arm around her, stroking her hair and they were kissing!!

And Brady LOVED blowing out his candle. We had to sing "Happy Birthday" to him at least a dozen times and cheer as he blew out that candle!

I know B didn't know the difference, but I'm gonna make it up to him.

We're planning on rescheduling the party either when my mom's here or sometime after Noah's born. We might move it to the bowling alley too, since he loved bowling so much.

Most important to me is that my baby knows how much he is loved and that his birthday is my favorite day of the year. It's the day my life changed forever. The day I knew what God had put me on this earth for.

Reluctant Mother

Multiple times each and every day, I'm on the couch (as I'm supposed to be at the moment), and Brady decides that he wants me off of the couch.

He walks up to me, grabs my finger, and says, "puuuuullll!", as he tries with all of his might to pull me off of the couch. If I don't get up as quickly as he thinks I should he then says, as he looks at me with the sweetest look I've ever seen, "Tum, Mommy!". So reluctantly, I come. And I follow as he guides me where ever it is that he wants me to go thinking that I wish he'd just let me be.

Today, as I was begrudgingly tagging along behind as he drug me to our bed, he kept turning around and looking up at me over his shoulder. I looked down at that little smiling face and those chubby little fingers wrapped around mine and realized that I shouldn't be so reluctant.

One day, sooner than I'd like, it won't be my hand that he's wanting to hold, or me that he'll want to go snuggle in bed with or just sit with him as he plays.

So, I'll go and follow just as long as he'll let me.

34 Weeks

I thought I'd do a quick update on this seemingly never ending pregnancy journey...which now that I can't get off of the couch, seems longer than never ending!

There will be no picture with this post. Since I'm on partial bed rest, that means I don't get out of my p.j.'s and my hair doesn't come out of it's pony tail. I do, however, still brush my teeth.

Here's the lowdown...

Weight gain: Let's not even go there! I will say that since Christmas, I haven't had much of an appetite, so I haven't gained any more since then. And I suppose I should be happy with the numbers, since they're considerably lower than with Brady...at this point with him, I was gaining about 2 lbs. per week!

Stretch Marks: All I can say is I must have some awesome elasticity to my skin! I don't know how any body could expand this much (or as much as it did with Brady) and not have a single stretch mark, but it doesn't. Thanks Mom & Dad for the great genes!

Belly Button: Still sittin' tight as an innie! This makes me happier than you know! :)

Clothes: My tops seem to be shrinking! Good thing I only need to wear p.j.'s for the next couple of weeks!

Sleep: Not so much. Although, this has improved since getting the Ambien.

Labor Signs: Unwanted, painful, much too regular contractions that have sent me to labor & delivery twice in the last week. Apparently, my body wants to expel my child. Thankfully, he's stubborn and isn't coming just yet.

Baby Movement: Oh, yeah! This kid thinks he's on Soul Train!

Cravings: Like I said, not much of an appetite. I have worse cravings when I'm not pregnant.

What I Miss Most: It's a toss up. (1) Living without burning stomach muscle pain and searing back spasms. (2) My waist.

Love At First Bite

A few mornings ago, Brady got to try out his first donut.

I know...

Every child needs to eat donuts occasionally; and what kind of mother am I to have deprived him of this sweet experience for two years?

It's just that we don't keep too much junk food around the house, so donuts don't usually make the grocery list. Brady gets his fill of sweet treats occasionally, but I don't want it to become a habit.

However...

With me on partial bed rest, Buck has been the one to do the grocery shopping, and when Daddy makes the list, somehow, lots more junk food appears in the pantry!

I will say that I enjoyed every second of watching this little monkey devour his chocolate donut. As you can see from the pictures, it was love at first bite!

Empty, But For This

For several months now, Noah's furniture has been sitting in his empty room. We're mere weeks away from his arrival, and it's still sitting in an empty room.

The problem is that the German and European style is VERY different from anything you'd find back in the states. The furniture is not German, it's from our furniture store here.

So, we can find nothing to coordinate in order to decorate his walls. Aside from sending my poor mother to Hobby Lobby with this picture or trying to match things up online there's not much I can do. I'm not too worried about it since we'll be moving back to the states this summer.

I'm planning a Hobby Lobby trip within the first few days of being home!

However, I did order drapes from Penny's and this, his bedding. I'm completely in love with it. It's soft and elegant and the little leap frogs add just a touch of whimsy. It looks so right in that little crib.

Now, we just need that sweet little baby in there to make it complete.

HE Will Take Care of Us

I really don't know how to start this one.

From the moment I found out I was pregnant with Noah, I had concerns that I would go into pre-term labor. Brady was born, healthy, at 36 weeks, but 36 weeks is still considered pre-term. I knew that there was a greater risk with this pregnancy that my baby would come early.

Yesterday, at 33 weeks and 1 day, that almost happened. I started having contractions in the morning. They were irregular, but more frequent than they should be, and I started paying attention. Shortly after lunch, they were 4 minutes apart and I was having some serious back pain. I called labor & delivery, knowing what they would say, and after throwing a few things into a bag, just in case, we were off to the hospital.

After they got me hooked up to all of the monitors the midwife came in and talked me through what the treatment plan would be and did an exam. She also spoke of the "worst case scenario" and told me not to be too concerned, that 33 week babies usually did well after a few weeks in the NICU and that if labor couldn't be stopped, some one from the NICU would be up to talk me through everything and answer my questions.

Those are things that no mother wants to hear or talk about.

Next, they ran two bags of fluid to try to hydrate the contractions away. That didn't work...at all. Two hours later, the contractions were MUCH more intense and my back was hurting so bad that I was white knuckling the bed rail.

They gave me a shot of something, I can't remember the name of the medication, and within 20 minutes the contractions were much less intense and my back was starting to relax for the first time in hours. After about an hour they had completely stopped. They did another exam, just to make sure that my cervix hadn't changed with all of those contractions, which I was sure it must have, but it didn't!

After going to the pharmacy to pick up some medication we were on our way home! My baby wasn't coming today!!

I'm not on strict bed rest, but I was told to stay off of my feet and sleep as much as possible. No cooking, no cleaning, no housework or errands of any kind, and NO more picking up Brady.

Now, I really just said all of that to say this...

From the moment I realized what was or could be happening I was uncharacteristically calm.

I began to pray and to keep my focus on the only One who could protect me and Noah.

"Be still, and KNOW that I AM GOD." Psalm 46:10

God placed that scripture in my heart and that was what kept running through my mind.

Sure, there were moments that I let myself "go there" and think about the what ifs of a baby born at just 33 weeks, and then I remembered something I read on a friend's blog who was doing a Beth Moore bible study.

"If __________ (insert your greatest fear into the blank), then _____________ (insert what you would do here) ____________."

If, Noah is born today and whisked off to battle it out in the NICU, then I would bawl my eyes out, wonder what is so broken about my body that I can't carry my children to term, maybe feel a little sorry for myself, then suck it up and do everything they told me to do in order to help my child survive. And, I would thank God for every day that I could watch him grow stronger.

The point of the exercise is this: No matter the if, the then is really always the same...

If, my greatest fear comes true...

Then, God will take care of me.

Then, God will take care of Noah.

And so, I held on to those two thoughts and never had a doubt that we would be okay.

The same God who created the universe...

Who calmed the storm...

Who walked on water...

Who gave me life...

Who formed my precious child 33 weeks ago...

The same God who has already ordained the day, the hour, the very second that he will enter into this world, was still God.

He was in control.

And He would take care of us.

And that's exactly what He did.

I don't know how much longer it will be before Noah makes his appearance, but I know that when he does, he will be okay.

My long term goal is to get to my 36 week appointment on the 4th of February, but until then I will thank God for every day that He allows Noah to stay put.

Every day is another day that Noah grows stronger, healthier and becomes more ready to make his transition into this world.

Every 24 hours counts!

So today, I'm thanking his Creator for the answered prayer of another 24 hours.

And for the peace He has given me in knowing that He is God, and He will take care of us.

Insomnia

Oh, sweet sleep...Why do you continue to elude me?

At this point I should be sleeping as much as possible. In just a few short weeks, I won't be able to sleep through the night...even if I could.

I'm 33 1/2 weeks. If this pregnancy is anything like the last, I only have 3 weeks to sleep!!

Wait...I'm not very good with Math...maybe I miscalculated...(counting on my fingers)...

Nope. I'm right. 3 weeks! Holy Moly!

Brady came at 36 weeks. I'm praying that Noah holds out until at least 37. For his sake.

Not that Brady had any health problems, but he could have. We were blessed.

Knowing how little time I have left freaks me out just a little.

Now I won't sleep because I'll be making mental notes and lists of all of the things I've procrastinated and how I need to get crackin' just in case he does come early.

I need to pack our bags.

First, I need to buy diapers to put in his bag. I remember the ones they had at the hospital were way to big for Brady.

Then I need to pack his bag...

And mine...

And Buck's...

And Brady's. Can't forget B. He needs an overnight bag too this time!

We need to get the car seat installed.

And the Boppy washed...

And all of the other laundry piled up in Noah's room.

At least the furniture is together...

Although we have to make a few minor adjustments to the cradle, because the bedding didn't fit quite right and the bumper won't tie on, so that presents a problem. I can't simply leave it that way and hope that my child is still enough to not knock it out of place and suffocate himself.

I don't want to be in the same situation we were in with Brady.

After I finished straightening my hair and applying my makeup I was literally throwing things into a bag as Buck frantically tried to figure out how to install the car seat in the dark, 5 minutes before we left for the hospital.

Don't judge...he came a month early. I thought we had plenty of time!

As for the hair and makeup...

I walked into labor & delivery convinced that it was false labor and that in an hour or two I would be going back home. I wasn't trying for a home birth.

48 hours later we walked out of the hospital with a tiny 5 lb. little runt.

I was in the same clothes that I walked into the hospital wearing, because in my haste, I forgot to bring an extra set. Okay...and because I REALLY thought I'd be back in my bed that night. I only packed a bag because my husband insisted.

So, I suppose that, just in case, I should have things in place a bit early this time.

And, maybe, just maybe, being prepared will take a little worry off my mind and help me sleep.

I Heart Faces--Best Face Photo Challenge

So, this is my first I Heart Faces photo challenge. The prize this week is fantastic...a 20x24 gallery wrapped canvas! Just the thing I'm wanting to decorate the walls of our new home when we move!

The photo had to be from the months of December or January, so lucky for me I had this sweet pic of my wild haired child, taken last week.

Hop on over to I Heart Faces for some great fun contests and beautiful photographs to inspire you to get that camera out and start shooting!

A Little More Photoshop Fun

Sorry to bore you with more photoshopped pictures of Brady, but I'm just obsessed with it! I can't stop! I start vibrating just thinking about having another pretty little face to play with in a few weeks!


Every time I have insomnia, I grab my computer and start editing my favorite old pics. I've been up on more than one night until 4 a.m. It's a bit of a sickness...I know!


Anyway...If you have a version of Photoshop and you have any idea how to use it (I had mine for about 6 months before I did anything other than open the program, scratch my head, and close it) I got these actions from Coffeshop (she has awesome FREE stuff and LOTS of it!) and the textures from Florabella.

My Boys

As I was looking through my pictures, trying to organize them, I came across these...the pictures from my 20 week ultrasounds.

The first is Noah...

The second, Brady.

I see similarities in them. The turned up noses. The puffy lips. Both of them with one hand raised and clenched.

I wonder how much they will look alike...or how much they won't. I wonder how closely their personalities will mirror one another...or how different they'll be.

And I get so excited!

I can't wait to see my little Noah...

To get to know him like I know Brady...

To see his precious face...

To hear his little cry...

To kiss his soft cheeks...

I know that he'll be wonderfully unique...

And that's what I want most.

As much as I love and adore B, I don't want Noah to be another Brady. I want to watch him grow into the precious little being that God has created him to be. Perfect in his own way. Wonderful in his own right.

Wild Haired Child

This morning B woke up with some seriously WILD hair! It was sticking up everywhere and I thought it was too adorable not to capture it. So I grabbed my camera and started taking a few pictures.

The originals didn't really 'wow' me. In fact I was a little disappointed. But, I thought a few had potential.

The first had some decent natural lighting, thanks to the 3 huge windows in our living room. The second was taken in our bedroom with the blinds down, so it was pretty dark and not so great looking.

After playing around with them in Photoshop for a while I think they're frame worthy! They captured the moment just as I saw it...

32 Weeks

Brady got these little capsules in his stocking. You put them in water and watch them slowly expand into some foam shape...a fish, a dinosaur...

As I was looking at this picture, I realize I'm kinda like those capsules...soft and expanding...only not so slowly!

Bowl-A-Rama

Tonight we went to a friend's little boy's birthday party at the bowling alley.

I figured Brady would be interested in the balls, but never did I think he would enjoy bowling so much! If I had known how much he'd enjoy it, I'd have planned his upcoming party there too.

Oh, well...there's always next year!

We were a bit shocked at this child's sheer strength. He could lift and carry around an 8 pound bowling ball! He's not even two!

The pictures speak for themselves...

And yes, he was representing the Black & Gold! He insisted on wearing his hat today. I added the jersey to his ensemble. WHO DAT?!?!

It's Just Too Sweet

This isn't a very long post, but I just had to get it down so I don't ever forget.

Since B started trying to say his first words I've been working with him on saying, please, thank you and the yes and no ma'ams and sirs. I wanted to make sure that our kids had good manners. I was raised in the south, and that's just the way it goes there. I think it's a great thing to show respect, so I expect our kids to do as I was taught.

For months now, he's been asking, "Please" when he wants something and saying, "Thank You" when he is given something (or if he gives me something).

As you know, I often call him, B. When B hands me something or follows a directive, I'll follow up with a simple, "Thank You, B.".

Apparently, I've said it a lot.

Now, everytime my child hands me something or does something he's supposed to he follows up with, "Thank You, B!".

It just makes me chuckle every time!